How is it possible to be happy yet still feel so sad? My mental health constantly plays tricks on me. Today I have been happier than I have been in a long time but sadness continues to creep up on me, enveloping me in its thick black cape.
In my mind I question recent events. Am I good enough? Do I deserve to be happy? Will it all end before it really begins ? Will my anxieties and lack of self confidence drive my happiness from me?
Music. This is the one source of relief from my fears. Listening to other peoples stories in the form of a song helps. It has always helped. A word from my favourite artist. A riff from a tuneful guitar. A solid beat from a bass drum. It all helps. If I pick apart the song I am listening to it takes my mind away from what is really going on.
I need a song now.